God is Only Good

Recently, I've noticed a lot of my Facebook friends recounting blessings God has given to them, followed by the statement, "God is good!"

I love reading about what God is doing in the lives of others. I believe this is Biblical. In fact, Ephesians 4:29 instructs us, "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." Certainly describing one of God's blessings and reminding others that God is good qualifies as something that builds others up and benefits those who listen.

I wonder, though, how often we say "God is good" when times are tough.

Let me tell you a little bit about my mom.

Less than a year ago, my mom lost her oldest sister to cancer. A second sister just had a double mastectomy and begins chemotherapy for breast cancer this week. Her brother recently had a second kidney transplant. Yesterday, while we were all gathered for our Thanksgiving dinner, she received a phone call telling her that my grandpa (her dad) may have had a stroke. And today my dad is being admitted for another of multiple hospital stays. We don't know what the doctor will decide, but he will either undergo a complicated vascular surgery or amputation of his second leg.

Yet as we stood talking yesterday, she told us about a book she had been reading, in which one of the characters made the statement, "Only God is good. God is only good." She said, "That really hit me. How many times have I accused God of not being good because of circumstances in my life? But God is only good."

My mom has always been the strong one in our family. So many times I have looked at her and wished I could be more like her. I truly believe she has the gift of faith. And what she said yesterday was a precious gift to me.

God is good. It defines Him. He does not change or cease to be good when troubles come our way. He was good when we sat at my Aunt Nancy's bedside as the cancer claimed her life. He didn't cease to be good when doctors had to amputate my dad's leg, or when he had a stroke. He will still be good even if a second amputation is required.

God does not cause the evil in this world. Sometimes, bad things happen simply because we live in a fallen world that has been affected by sin. God doesn't promise to stop those things from happening or to make us immune from pain simply because we have put our faith in Him.

Here is what He does promise, though: "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose" (Romans 8:28).

Sometimes I can't see how a situation in my life or in the life of someone I love can possibly work for good. But my God is the God of the impossible. I may never "get it" until I am in heaven someday. But I trust in His goodness and His purpose in all things. He may not stop the trials from coming our way, but He will use them for good.

In good times and in hard times, God is only good.

Ireland, Part II

Ireland. Truthfully, it's a place I never thought I would visit. I don't have any ancestral heritage there, and although I've always thought it looked like a beautiful place, I just never imagined I would go there some day. But I cannot fathom the mind of God, and He had plans for Lars and me that we could not have thought of ourselves.

And so last week we found ourselves in Ireland as part of a team of six people from our church. We had gone to lead worship for an evangelism conference that was taking place in Galway, on the eastern side of the country. It won't be possible for me to adequately describe our experiences here on this blog, but I'll do my best to share it with you.

We learned while we were in Ireland that there are 17,000 Christians in that country, which has a population of just over 4 million. That means less than one percent of the people living in that country are followers of Jesus Christ. These are a people in desperate need of the Gospel. They need the hope of Christ and His salvation.

Our team (minus Lars, who was taking the photo) in Dublin

Our purpose as a team was to provide support and encouragement for the few believers in Galway by leading worship at an evangelism conference, where they would be taught how to share their faith with so many non-believers in their city and country. They simply don't have the resources we have here in America and so often take for granted. Conferences and training seminars are everywhere here; there, many of them have never been taught how to share their faith with the people around them.

Our trip began with a bit of uncertainty as Hurricane Sandy slammed into the East Coast of the United States and changed our flight plans: not once, but twice. Right away, we saw God show up and knew we would have to trust Him with every detail of our trip. We crammed ourselves and our gear into a minivan and drove to Chicago, making it through security just in time to board a flight to Dublin.

We arrived in Dublin on the morning of Halloween, exhausted but thankful to be there. The drive from Dublin to Galway revealed Ireland to be the land of rolling, green hills we had always heard it was: lush green grass, farm houses, and stone walls keeping the sheep and cows in the proper pastures. It was rather drizzly and cold, but beautiful nonetheless.

Our worship pastor is actually from Galway, and his brother is the pastor of Discovery Church, the church that did most of the planning for the conference. Just up the road from his house, there is a house owned by a family who actually lives in England, so the house was vacant. We were allowed to stay there as a team throughout our trip, which was an incredible blessing. I thoroughly enjoyed walking outside in the evenings and hearing the mooing of the cows. It was such a calm, relaxing environment, so far removed from the big cities of the United States.

That first day was primarily and adjustment day, having traveled overnight and into a time zone that was four hours ahead of Michigan (it was five hours by the time we came home; they set their clocks back one week before we did). We did have a chance that day to visit the ruins of an old friary. The Catholic influence in Southern Ireland is huge. In fact, in the home where we were staying, there were a couple little vials of "holy water," and lit-up images of Mary. This is a large contributing factor to the absence of Christianity. For centuries, people there have seen God as a cold, distant figurehead up in the sky who must be appeased by penance and ceremony. There is very little understanding of grace or salvation through the blood of Christ rather than works.

The second day, we had a few hours to do some sight-seeing before heading into town to set up and rehearse for the conference. We visited Ashford Castle in Mayo, which was founded in 1228. Two additions were made to the castle in 1852. The castle itself is stunning, as are the trees, gardens, and fountains around it. There is an incredible sense of nostalgia when you look at something that old - built 548 years before the United States even became a nation! As we walked around the castle grounds, we wondered aloud what it must have been like to live in those days.

Just outside the castle grounds lie the ruins of a 12th Century Augustinian Abbey. Again, it was fascinating to walk through the remains of the stone structures and wonder what life was like for them in those days. We did take note of the many grave markers that said things like, "Pray for the soul of..." or "May the Lord have mercy on the soul of..." How sad to bury your loved ones with no confidence of eternal life in heaven! I can't even imagine living my life, hoping that I was doing enough good to make it into heaven when I die.

That evening, after our rehearsal time, the conference began with an evening of testimonies by men whose lives had been changed as a result of the Teen Challenge ministry in Ireland. We sat and listened to several men share about anger, violence, drugs, and alcohol, and how God had delivered them from those things. Two of them, in particular, came from strong republican families in Northern Ireland and were taught from an early age to hate the British. Several of them spoke of fathers whose way of teaching their sons to be tough was to beat them. It brought tears to my eyes to listen to them speak of how God had taken hold of their lives and turned them around. At the end of the evening, as we sang a worship song together, I saw them lift their hands and raise their voices in worship to our God. There are just no words to describe what an incredible experience that was.

The rest of the conference took place over the next two days. We had an opportunity to lead worship at several points throughout the two days, and it was such a delight to join my voice with the voices of the Irish believers! I know God was pleased with the offering that was brought to Him.

We also had the privilege of sitting under the teaching of Mike Vickers, a pastor from England who has taken several cross walks across European countries. He has a wooden cross that he carries, walking mile after mile, sharing the Gospel with anyone who approaches him as he carries the cross through the country. He told powerful stories of how God met his needs and worked through him to bring the message of salvation to so many people. One powerful point he made was taken from an interview with one of the Penn & Teller magicians who is an atheist, and posed the question, "How much do you have to hate a person to not share with them the message of salvation?"

There were two things in particular about the church in Ireland that impacted me while we were there. One was their passion for the lost in their nation. As I listened to the prayers that were offered up by the people, it was evident that their hearts are burdened for unbelievers, and that they long for God to bring about a revival in their nation. The second was their commitment to doing ministry outside the church. They have a food trailer, and each week they go into the city with their food trailer and feed the homeless. They are constantly seeking ways to minister to the people, not just in word, but in deed. Showing them the love of Christ, then telling them about it. It was a wonderful thing to witness.

Sunday morning we had the privilege of leading worship for Discovery Church's morning worship service. Again, what an incredible experience to worship with people from a distant country, yet knowing we are all part of the body of Christ!

After church, we had a chance to visit the Cliffs of Moher (AKA the Cliffs of Insanity of you've seen the Princess Bride). We knew we weren't visiting Ireland on a vacation and wouldn't have a lot of time for sight-seeing, but seeing the ocean waves pound against the cliffs was truly an awe-inspiring sight. Nothing man has made can compare to the majesty of God's creation.

We also had an opportunity to spend a little time with our worship pastor's family, the Cullens. They prepared a wonderful meal for us and welcomed us into their home. We thoroughly enjoyed talking and laughing with them, and quickly came to love them as we spent time together. Carole, our worship pastor's mom, served us the traditional Irish Christmas dinner: ham and turkey, stuffing, vegetables, stuffed tomatoes, mashed and roasted potatoes, rolls, and Irish gravy to drown everything. It was a precious gift to us, this newfound sense of family with our brothers and sisters 3,000 miles away.

It's amazing how quickly the time flew, and now here we are back home again. It feels like we were blessed far more than we were able to bless the people there, but I trust that God used us in a special way while we were there. It was an incredible trip, and I truly hope it won't be our last!

"God's Got This": Ireland, Part I

Have you ever made God a promise, but not really expected Him to hold you to it? If you have no idea what I'm talking about, then I guess you have a stronger faith than I do... or did, before this past week.

It was just a couple of months ago when Lars came home from work one day with the crazy idea that we could go to Ireland on a missions trip. Our worship pastor is from Ireland, and our church maintains a partnership with Discovery Church in Galway, Ireland, a church he and his wife helped plant before coming to Trinity. They were planning an evangelism conference and had asked for a team from Trinity to come and lead worship. The question was, were we willing to go?

Now, if you know me well or have read my testimony, you know I struggle with fear and anxiety. And although God has brought me a long way on my journey out of that darkness, I have still felt the chains. So in order to give you a clear picture of what God really did for me this week, you need to know a few secrets about me. (Please don't hold this against me; I may be a little crazy, but God still loves me.)

1. I hate flying: the going up, the going down, any turbulence in between, and being crammed into small
spaces with total strangers. It just freaks me out.

2. I don't do well in situations where I have to share sleeping quarters with other people. Noises in the night can make me feel panicked. In fact, my amazing husband has driven me home from a four-star hotel in Grand Rapids at 2:00 in the morning because of a middle-of-the-night panic attack. This is something God has really helped me with, and I haven't had that kind of extreme experience in several years, but the idea of staying in a hotel or home where other people are sleeping is still difficult for me.

3. I really like it when things are in order and everything goes according to the plan. I'm not a big fan of the unknown, or of last-minute changes.

In spite of these challenges in my life, I am also determined not to let Satan have the upper hand. I know my battle is not against flesh and blood, but against the powers of darkness. And I know through the blood of Jesus Christ, I have victory over that. This is the confidence God has given me over the past several years as I have journeyed with Him out of the darkness of fear and anxiety. I'm not all the way there yet, but I'm determined to get there with God's help.

So when this idea of a trip to Ireland came to me, all the worries and the what-if's came to my mind. We can't even afford this trip for one of us. How are we going to raise enough money for both of us to go? Can I seriously get on a plane and fly 3,000 miles, over the Atlantic Ocean? How can I handle staying in a home with other people for six nights? What about my boys? How can I leave them here and go to another country? What if they get sick or hurt while I'm gone? Can I do this, God?

We sat in a meeting with one of the coordinators of the partnership between Trinity and Discovery Church, and she said three words that stuck with me throughout the entire trip: "God's got this." Truth? I can't do this on my own. No way. But I'm not on my own. God's got this.

And so the promise, and, like Gideon, the fleece: "God if you want me to go, I'll go. But you have to provide the money. If you do, I'll know it's Your will, and I will go."

Two weeks before the trip, we did not have enough funds for both of us to go. I admit, I felt a small sense of relief. Maybe God was letting me off the hook. Maybe He just wanted to see if I was willing, but He wasn't really going to require me to go. You know, just like He provided the ram in the thicket for Abraham.

We had a decision to make: do we commit to the trip and have the church purchase our tickets, knowing we'll be responsible for the rest of the funds if they don't come in? Or do we simply say Lars will go, and I will stay?

"God's got this."

Yes, I have a tendency to be afraid of things. But I refuse to let my fears keep me from being effective for God. By the power of God, I won't let Satan win the battles in my heart. We committed to the trip, and as soon as we took that step of faith, the rest of our funds came in. God had indeed provided.

Our flights were booked from Detroit to Newark, New Jersey, to Shannon, Ireland. Then Hurricane Sandy hit the East Coast and the airlines began canceling flights. What now, God? He came through in a hurry, and we were able to get a different flight from Lansing to Chicago to Dublin. But then, the morning of our flight, we were notified that the Lansing to Chicago flight was also canceled. Another change of plans, and we hadn't even left yet! Oh,  how I hate changes in plans. I was filled with anxiety as I kissed my boys goodbye and the six of us who were going crammed into a van headed for Chicago.

"God's got this." The more I said it, the more I believed it.

We made it in time for our flight, and as I settled into the seat next to Lars, I began to pray that God would change me as a result of this trip. I knew I was going to serve, and not with a "what's in it for me?" attitude, but I really wanted God to work in my heart through this experience.

As I sit here this morning, reflecting on our trip, I can't even find words adequate to express my gratitude to God for this experience. I saw Him there so many times, even down to the little things I know He did just for me, to help me feel more comfortable. Like the arrangement of the seats on the plane, so that Lars and I were in a row with two seats and neither of us had to sit next to someone we didn't know. He strengthened me when I needed it, and He gave me peace enough to sleep at night in an unfamiliar environment where other people were sharing the same home.

And, oh, how incredible it was to worship with my brothers and sisters in Ireland! To hear them raise their voices to our God, and together to express our hearts of love and adoration to Him.

Thursday evening, Carole Cullen, our worship pastor's mother, shared a verse from the book of Jeremiah, where God says to His children, "I was hoping you would call me, 'My Father.'" That verse echoed in my mind for the rest of our trip. How God longs for us to call Him "Father" and look to Him in our times of joy and of sorrow! At the end of that evening's session, there was a prayer team, and anyone who wanted prayer could walk forward and be prayed with. I was glued to my seat, trying to ignore the prompting of the Holy Spirit to take that first step. I felt the conviction in my heart, a nudging from God: "I want to help you overcome your fears, but you have to take the first step." So I got up out of my seat and went forward for prayer. I explained some of my fears briefly to the dear lady who held my hands, and when I talked to her about my kids, she described to me a time when she had gone to France and left her children behind. She said, "I realized, I'm not even really the one who takes care of them when I'm home. They are God's children. If He cares for them when I'm home, why wouldn't He care for them when I'm not home?" Then she prayed for me. I didn't feel a huge change come over me, but it was just so wonderful to express my fears to someone and have that person pray for me.

On Sunday, after the worship service, I had the most amazing experience of being prayed for by a group of women from the church there. They prayed for the chains of fear and anxiety that have bound me to be broken. They boldly declared that Satan had no right to oppress me because I am a child of God, covered in the blood of His Son Jesus. They challenged me not to take up those chains again. It was such a powerful thing to hear them pray for me in that way. I couldn't stop crying while they prayed over me, and I couldn't stop smiling afterwards. I can truly say I felt chains fall off. Even when we encountered some turbulence on the flight home, I was not afraid. Now I must remain firm and not give in to the temptation to take those chains back up. They are gone; I've been set free!

I went to Ireland to serve, because I felt God was calling me to go. I pray that I was in some small way a blessing to the believers there. But I hardly even feel like I can call it a missions trip. I got to go and do something I love, worship, and the blessing of God was poured out on me through the people and our experiences there.

One of the things the speaker at the conference said was that, when we speak our testimony, it opens the door for God to work the same miracle in someone else's life. That's why I share all of this now. When I think about that meeting several weeks ago, and the words, "God's got this," I can only smile. I never meant to doubt; it just creeps in. But God has allowed me to see Him in a whole new way. More than I could ever have asked or imagined.