It's the Little Things

Today, two of our staff girls arrived at the Arizona Ranch after driving here from our Michigan campus. Among the things they brought with them was one of Lars' favorite travel mugs - a silver Biggby Coffee mug that fits nicely into the cupholders in our car because it doesn't have handles.

Attached to the mug was a note from my mom, asking the girls to bring the mug out to Lars. When I saw her handwriting, I just wanted to sit down and cry. Silly, I know. The note wasn't even written to us. But I miss her.

It made me realize how much the little things matter to me.

My mom isn't the kind of person who needs to be the center of attention all the time. She's content to be in the background, quietly making sure everything gets done and everyone's needs are met. She is the epitome of true servanthood.

When Lukas was born, she came and stayed with us for a week. Stefan was 2, and I had just had a C-section so I wasn't supposed to lift anything heavier than the baby. The day after we came home, summer staff orientation at Youth Haven began, and Lars needed to be involved with that. I don't know what I would have done without my mom.

She has always been there, supporting and encouraging me in every little way she can. Proofreading my papers for college. Playing the piano for me when I sang. Hemming my pants and skirts that are always too long. Babysitting on Saturdays when Lars and I have both been on the worship team at church. Watering my plants and taking care of our cat and goldfish while we're away.

So I'm not surprised she thought about sending Lars' favorite mug out with the girls when they came. That's just the kind of thing she would do.

I suppose I got spoiled having her so close and working in the same office together. Sometimes when we're in Michigan, I'll just go sit in her office simply because I'm glad she's there. I miss that. I miss having supper at their house and making s'mores around the firepit in their back yard.

But even though the miles separate us, I know my mom is there for me. I can call her and talk to her about anything. I know she'll listen, give me her wisdom, and pray for me. She is an incredible blessing from God.

Sometimes it feels like, as a mother, I am always giving. Now I know that a mother's giving never stops, even when her kids are grown. I've often been told I look like my mom. I hope to be like her in so much more than appearance.

A Few Revelations

Here's a little revelation for you: I am not the most domestic person.

Yesterday I sewed four patches on the boys' Lowe's aprons for the Build and Grow workshops they attended. It seriously took me 20 minutes just to get the thread through the eye of the needle. By the time I was done with all four patches, my fingers were sore. I never did get the hang of the thimble.

Second revelation: I hate cooking. I know, I can hear you gasp as you read this. Alas, it is true. If I can take it out of the freezer, pop it in the oven or microwave, and then serve it up, that makes me happy. Oh, I can follow a recipe easily enough, but I find that buying all the ingredients for a recipe that sounds good often costs more than my grocery budget will allow - especially when it comes to healthy foods. Besides, I make a mess when I cook and I hate cleaning up afterward. Why should I slave over something fancy when my kids would prefer tacos, sloppy joes, or mac & cheese anyway?

Now, I do want my family to be healthy, so I do my best to provide good, healthy food choices. I try to avoid preservatives (thank you, Stouffer's!), growth hormones, and pesticides. But I do not find any joy in cooking, and I am certainly not going to win any gourmet cooking awards.

Third revelation: I do not remember the last time I ironed a piece of clothing. It is one household chore that I avoid as much as possible. I have no idea why, but I dread the task of ironing. I don't buy clothes unless they are wrinkle free. And my family always looks nice on Sunday mornings, even without having to lift an iron!

I am so not like my sister, sometimes I wonder how we even came from the same two parents. She grows her own fruits and vegetables, cans things, makes her own salsa, jams, and breads. She cooks, sews, and irons!

So here's revelation number four: it's okay. I don't have to be a gourmet cook or exquisite seamstress. I don't even have to have a green thumb. God created me exactly as He wants me. He even knit me together in my mother's womb (Psalm 139:13). That means He painstakingly pieced me together to be His very own work of art.

Just as my sister and I are very different, my two boys are, too. Stefan is far more musically inclined. He can hear a song on his iPod and figure out how to play it on the piano. I really believe God has gifted him in that. Lukas isn't so interested in music, but he can hit just about any ball you pitch to him.

God has given each one of us the individual talents, gifts, and skills He wants us to have. We are all different from one another, with different abilities and interests. So the next time someone tries to pressure you to do something God hasn't gifted you to do, know that it's okay to say "No." Then think about what He has gifted you to do and "work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men" (Colossians 3:23).

Isn't it nice to know we don't have to try to become something we're not?

Obedience

It's hard to believe the summer season at Youth Haven is almost over.

We arrived back at the Arizona Ranch campus on Sunday afternoon. We've been back and forth so much this year, it feels like we're always saying goodbye. I admit, it was pretty tough to say goodbye to my family this time around.

In fact, the last day we were at home in Michigan, I was really struggling with leaving again. The Lord brought to my mind Philippians 4:13, the familiar verse that says, "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength." My response was, "I know I can, but sometimes I just don't want to."

But obedience must come before what I want. And part of being supportive of my husband in his ministry is being willing to say goodbye, even when it's hard. He and I are a team, and I know God has a lot more for us to do out here.

Well, that was even more evident today as we, yet again, said goodbye. Goodbye to a great group of teens who had been here for the last of our summer sessions in Arizona. Most of them start school next week, so it was fun to have them here before they head back to their environments.

We had a great time leading them in worship, sharing meals with them, and watching them laugh together. They were a little rowdy sometimes, but, hey, they're teens. Teens from some pretty tough circumstances. Teens who love to come to Youth Haven because when they're here, they're loved.

After lunch today, just before they would all be picked up, they were invited to stand up and share something they learned this week at Youth Haven. One by one, we listened to them tell heartbreaking stories that now end with hope because of Youth Haven.

There was the 14-year-old girl who has a baby at home and learned that God forgives.

There was the teenaged boy who talked about being shifted from foster home to foster home, but always knowing he had a family at Youth Haven.

There was the young lady who said, "I thought God had forgotten me when I was taken away from my sister. But now I know He didn't forget about me, and He is always with me."

And many other teens - our nation's leaders of tomorrow - who stood up and said that they want to live for Jesus because of what they have learned and experienced at Youth Haven.

I sat with tears in my eyes as I listened to them. Oh, to be able to take away the pain that so many of them have experienced! We know that as they went home today, then went back into some pretty tough situations.

Then Lars stood up and encouraged them all not to forget what they have learned, and told them that we would be praying for them and are always here for them.

I am grateful beyond words that God would allow us to be part of this incredible ministry - and for a husband who is giving his life to something bigger than ourselves. I am so proud of him for showing those boys what it means to be a man of God when they have no example of that at home.

Sometimes it is hard to obey. But when we are willing, God will use us. He will give us the strength we need. And sometimes, He even rewards us with a glimpse of what He's doing through us.

I hate to think of missing out on that reward by choosing not to obey. Even more, I hate to think of how those kids would have been affected. I choose obedience, and I pray that God will continue to use me.